Aislinn recentely came back to the Yukon after a year of studying Art Therapy in Nelson. Her and Geneviève picked up a play they hadn't touched in over a year. There was a lot to write, talk, think and smile about. I feel a lot more cozy writing sessions throughout this Yukon summer. Who needs rest when you've got 24 hours of daylight?
Time to write
Almost exactly a year after Leave a message (apres le bip) was performed at the Homegrown Theatre Festival, the co-writers Aislinn Cornett and Genevieve Doyon are ready to dive back into the script. Next week, Aislinn and Genevieve will be writing away with the Vancouver dramaturg DD Kugler as part of Nakai's Playlab.
It'll be great to pick up the script, dust it off, type away and discover where this story takes us!
A New Open Pit!
Open Pit is sad to announce that Sam Bergmann-Good, one of the co-founders of Open Pit has decided to step down as Co-Artistic Producer. His career has led him outside of the Yukon, and although we will miss his creative input we wish him all the best in the future.
On another note, we would like to announce:
The fabulously talented Geneviève Doyon is our new Co-Artistic Producer!
In June 2011, Geneviève participated inThe Devised Yukon Project, and has been working with Open Pit ever since. When Sam announced that he was going to be stepping down, it was clear that Geneviève would be the perfect candidate for the position. We welcome her with open arms!
Geneviève will be responsible for Open Pit's community outreach, local communication, marketing, and production managment, while Jessica Hickman continues to support Open Pit as the main administrator, finance co-ordinator, and grantwriter. Both Geneviève and Jessica, with support from the board-of-directors, will be in charge of the artistic direction of the company.
This season, Open Pit plans to continue the development of Leave a Message (apres le bip) , bring a guest instructor to the Yukon to offer a vocal training workshop, and host one kick ass fundraiser!
We can't wait to get this year started!
October 2012: Victoria Play Development Workshop
From October 8th to October 14th Open Pit held a one week workshop of Nowhere Near
in Victoria, BC. Eleven physical theatre artists were hired and the
company spent seven days working with the ensemble to both create new
material and re-visit material from the first production in 2010. The
goal of the workshop was to focus on the physical aspects of the show
and to then document the material for future grants.
The workshop was held at Suddenly Dance Theatre. On the last day, Open Pit rented the Intrepid Theatre and hired a local film company, Lighthead Productions, to film the generated material. Please see the video below. Here is a list of partcipants:
- Whitehorse, YT: Sam Bergmann-Good, Genevieve Doyon
- Vancouver, BC: Sarah Moore
- Toronto, ON: Shae Wojtus
- Victoria, BC: Michael Shewchuk, Mily Mumford, Emma Zabloski, Connor Parnall, Ryan Levis, Camille Janicki, Alexa MacDougall, Andrew Barrett, Brandy Baybutt, Diana Nielsen, Jessica Hickman
July 2011: Physical Theatre Workshops with Ker Wells
Nakai Theatre, with assistance from Open Pit, organised two workshops taught by guest instructor Ker Wells. Here is information about the first workshop, An Introduction to Physical Theatre:
Date: July 12th - July 14th
Location: Yukon Arts Centre Studio Theatre
Total in-studio hours: 9
Number of participants: 11
Age range of participants: 20 - 50
The second
workshop was titled The Nature of the Performed Action and was
considered advanced training. Here is more information on the second
workshop:
Date: July 19th - July 23rd
Location: Yukon Arts Centre Studio Theatre
Total in-studio hours: 18
Number of participants: 6
Age range of participants: 24 - 30
Upon request, we offered subsidized rates for those in financial need.
Impact
The
participants of the workshops had a wide range of skill levels, therefore the
training affected each of them differently. We asked that participants have
previous theatre experience, but we made sure to not exclude anyone with a keen
interest.
Participants who had less experience in theatre thought the workshops were interesting and very different from what they were used to.
“I loved that Ker offered a type of training that I have never tried before. Physical Theatre does not exist in the north so I am appreciative that I could learn new techniques.”
The more professional level participants, who took both workshops, found some great insight into creation using Physical Theatre. A post mortem was held on the final day and participants remarked how they benefited from getting to see Ker Wells’ creative process. It was also noted how this work could be directly applied to the creation of a new play. There was also benefit in the training as an actor. Participants learned about creative impulses and how to access them. Ker Wells’ training made impulses seem tangible and, if not understood, more accessible.“Physical Theatre is a new concept to me and as yet, I have not grasped it’s essence; however, I have no doubt that it would be a valuable tool for me to add a richer element to the development of characters in the future.”
These
workshops also had an impact on the trainer, Ker Wells. He thoroughly enjoyed
his time in our city and even took part in a public reading of Catherine Frid’s
Homegrown. He has committed to returning this winter for Nakai Theatre’s
Pivot festival. There were also informal discussions about further partnerships
and opportunities in the north. We believe that having this calibre of talent
interested in working in Yukon is an exciting development for the theatre
industry.
“It was immediately apparent that Ker Wells brings a tremendous amount of knowledge and experience to the workshop. I highly respected the quality of the responses he provided to any participants questions as well as his instinctive awareness of what is needed to overcome any blocks that a participant is struggling with.”
Victoria Play Development Workshop
In October 2012, Open Pit hired twelve physical theatre performers from across Canada to participate in a one week workshop in Victoria, BC. The performers, under the direction of Sam Bergmann-Good and Jessica Hickman workshopped material from Open Pit's current show in development Nowhere Near.
At the end of the week, Open Pit joined forces with local filmmaker Michael Worth to document the material. Take a look below.
A Message From Our Logo Designer
An open letter on logo redesign
Since the beginning of the project, the energy and enthusiasm from the Open Pit members has been phenomenal. The passion and dedication to the organization and the work they do provided great inspiration and drive to find something that better represented the art and community that is Open Pit. The way Open Pit fosters creative growth and collaboration is a key aspect of who they are and it was very important to show that where design was concerned. After our first meeting I was thankful to be able to work together on the redesign and it became a true showcase for what the Open Pit collective is really about.
With regard to the new logotype, I hope everyone enjoys the new direction, which is not intended to been cold or corporate but fresh and invigorating; a strong symbol of what Open Pit is for its audiences and community. I hope that it inspires people to join in and be involved with a circle of people who want to build brand new experiences both inside and outside of the theatre.
Working with Open Pit has been a great experience. I hope to see the Open Pit community grow and continue to create great things for audiences and participants in the Yukon and elsewhere. I am also glad to be a part of that community and share in the enjoyment that Open Pit brings to everyone.
William Workman
Play code
Putting a play together takes paper.
New Site / New Work
Hi guys!
We have a new Web site design to go with our beautiful new logo! William Workman created the logo and Sam built this new design around it. We think it embodies the Open Pit that we are.
Let us know what you think! Here, or on Facebook!
Yeah! We are also in Victoria this week working on physical material for Nowhere Near. Stay tuned for more of that business, but right now, enjoy the new site. Check out our photos. The one at the top of this page will change many a time, so keep coming back to see new things!
Thanks!
Sam
&
Jessica
Call for performers (Victoria, BC)
Getting back at er
We are back in the creating zone this week!
Jessica and I are working on Draft #2 of Nowhere Near with dramaturgical assitance from the Canada famous Don Kugler. He is a lot nicer than I expected. Bonus.
Jess couldn't make it up for this session, so we are gathering online to do some serious typing. The play has shifted quite considerably in focus from what was presented last summer. We want to focus more on the characters and less on the survival.
For me, the people are what is interesting in a play. The situation is just there to reveal something about the people. It is with this notion that we are moving forward. There is still a bus crash, but maybe the whole play takes place during that crash. Maybe we enter limbo and get to examine the people in the crash. Maybe they are connected not a in a literal sense but internally: their drives and motivations. Who know? Right now we are just typing away and seeing what might happen. What connections occur.
I really want to return to this idea of 'openness' in our process. We've been struggling to find funding this year and our public "outreach" has suffered. I haven't been posting because there was nothign to post about. Well thats not true; I just didn't have the motivation to post. So, in the spirit of openness, here is something I just wrote for a character in Nowhere Near. It may or may not be used, but I thought it would be nice to share anyways:
GEN
Buy 4 cans of deodorant and a model rocket kit. You can find them in hobby shops. The rocket kit; the deodorant you can find anywhere. The only thing you need in the rocket kit is the gunpowder case and sparker. Throw the rest away, unless you want to make a rocket someday. So you’re going to take all the tops off the deodorant and duct tape them together. Oh, you need to buy a fuse and a rag. Or just use an old shirt. Tie the fuse to the rag and then put the fuse, gunpowder case and sparker together. You really want to get it in there. With a screwdriver, or something, stab a hole into one of the deodorants and then stuff the rag in there.
SARAH
So it’s aerosol deodorant, not the stick?
GEN
Aerosol? Not the stick no.
Now all you have to do is ignite the gunpowder to start the fuse to. That will blow up the dynamite. The deodorant. Peeewwwwwwwwww Kaboom.
Alright. I feel vulnerable now. Sharing like that. It's a good thing. Take care.
Sam
AGM! / Homegrown Theatre Festival
The Open Pit Performance League (official title) held its' first AGM last Thursday. It was an exciting step for our new theatre company. We have a great group of young, energetic directors and you can find out who they are on our Society Page. I think it's going to be a good year.
Open Pit has a show in Nakai Theatre's Homegrown Theatre Festival in Whitehorse. Homegrown is a fringe-like festival for local artists and I'm very happy to be a part of such a diverse display of performing arts.
One Act; 1 Hour
In One Act; 1 Hour 5 playwrights from all over Canada will get together online to collaboratively write a new play. Each night there will be a different group of writers and they will be collaborating in different ways. Some of the writers have chosen to write individual scenes and tie them altogether. Others, are writing line by line with each of them taking on a specific character. For each presentation they will be asking the audience 5 questions from which they will base their play. They only have 30 minutes for the actual writing to take place. Talk about an exercise in fast typing! After the play is completed, three intrepid local actors will take the brand new script and perform it. They only have 30 minutes for the performance, so it will be fast, furious and fun. This is a brand new experiment in collaboration. It combines aspects of improv and 24 hour writing competitions. I'm really looking forward to what ends up coming out of these writing nights.
All of this would be impossible without equipment. Open Pit is so happy to have the local Mac gurus at Meadia Solutions provide the equipment for One Act; 1 Hour. Everytime I go to Meadia Solutions I end up walking out with something. Today, it was a new iPhone case and a Zagg keyboard for my iPad. I'm typing on it right now and it is so much easier than tapping to the screen. If your in the market for a new Mac, or just have questions about one you own, Meadia Solutions is the place to go in Whitehorse. They are also very friendly. Check them out online at: or visit them at 20 Hanson st. Thank you Meadia Solutions for supporting the local art scene in Whitehorse.
One Act; 1 Hour
Wednesday, May 9 @ 7:0pm
Friday, May 11 @ 7:00pm
Saturday, May 12 @ 7:35pm
A new show everytime! For schedule information and to buy tickets visit:
One Act; 1 Hour
Open Pit
is seeking emerging playwrights for a new production: One Act; 1 Hour.
In One Act; 1 Hour, five playwrights from across Canada will gather online via Google Docs to write a one act play in 30 minutes. Each playwright is allowed to ask the audience one question which will be used to form the story of the play. The result of their work will then be performed by three actors. One Act; 1 Hour will be shown during Nakai Theatre’s Homegrown Theatre Festival from May 8 - 13.
Open Pit is looking for emerging playwrights from across Canada that would be interested in the challenge of writing a collaborative play in only thirty minutes. Your commitment would include:
- 30 minutes of writing one evening between May 8 - 13 (schedule to be determined).
- Collaborating with four other playwrights to create a one act play.
- Possible Skype interviews during this time.
If you are interested please contact Sam Bergmann-Good as soon as possible at: sam@openp.it
Open Pit is a new performing arts organisation based in Whitehorse, Yukon. Our aim is to create new works of theatre using non-traditional methods. Last summer, Open Pit received funding from the Federal and Territorial governments to complete the first phase of development on a new play entitled Nowhere Near. More information can be found at Open Pit’s website: http://openp.it
Homegrown Theatre Festival is a fringe style festival held once every two years in Whitehorse, Yukon. It is organised by Nakai Theatre and provides an opportunity for professional and community theatre artists to exhibit new and developing works. More information on Homegrown can be found at Nakai’s website: http://nakaitheatre.com
What's going on?
Whew,
One chapter of the year comes to a close as the dead of winter hits us once again. The holidays represent a brief journey to the surface to gasp for air before I dive under again. This is an exciting time of learning and growth for both myself and Open Pit. Jessica and I are hard at work to ensure we can carry out our plans for next summer.
Last year, we had two major projects. First, the Devised Yukon Project: Phase 1 which resulted in the shows Nowhere Near. Second, we partnered with Nakai Theatre to bring Ker Wells to the Yukon for professional development.
Next year, we are planning three projects. Two new-works development and one training initiative. These are all just in the planning stages, so things may change as the project vision's become distilled. The projects are:
- Devised Yukon Project: Phase 2 (Nowhere Near)
In the second stage of development for Nowhere Near, we plan on investigating dramaturgy for a play created collectively. We will examine the play on both the textual and physical layers. A somewhat final draft will appear out of these explorations.
- The Cordelia Project
The Cordelia Project examines the role of Cordelia in Shakespeare's King Lear. The challenge of this project is being respectful of the source material and its' language while also pushing the boundaries of that language to crack open Cordelia's secrets. The Cordelia Project is another opportunity for us to explore different creation processes.
- Creation Workshop
We are hoping to bring up another professional artist and educator for a workshop centered around creation. Where do good ideas come from? What is the process of going from an idea to a creation? This is workshop is designed for artists of all kinds and will involve working through the process, not just talking about it. I'm very excited about this one.
Again, these projects may shift and change as we get closer to May. I will do my best to keep this updated as details develop. We will have to see how intesive my new year looks.
All the best,
Sam Bergmann–Good
Vocabulary
I was talking to my classmate Sina tonight and the topic of vocabulary came up in relation to the work Open Pit did over the summer. He had been reading the blog posts and had a different take on what we were trying to do while defining our vocabulary. Vocabulary as written, and talked, about a lot over the course of the summer. A new group of people working together need to get on the same page. As actors we all have a set of vocabulary, but what those words actually mean can differ from person to person. It was important to us, working together for the first time, to make sure that when something was said it wasn't going to be interpreted differently by another member. I think this is a benefit to working with the same people over an extended period; you stop needing to clarify what you're saying.
Sina interpreted our search for common vocabulary as a search on a grander scale. I'm not sure I really got the crux of what he meant, but I think he saw us exploring vocabulary in a broader sense, for the whole community. For example, he said we were looking for a new definition for what good acting was. I don't think I can do that for everybody. I told him that we defined good acting internally; good acting for Open spit will be the subjective opinion of the people working here. I don't think you can change how people view things just by redefining what that thing is. You change things by doing.
This might have been what he was talking about. We were exploring and experimenting throughout the Devised Yukon Project. I always tell people that the summer was as much about creating something as it was about discovering how to create. I don't want to lock myself into a specific method of creation, but instead discover a new method with each project. I think I've said this before. That doesn't mean I plan on ignoring the vast amount of creation knowledge that the past holds. I want to use that information, remix it, and push those methods forward. If theatre creation was evolution I would want to be homo superior. If I knew how to surf I would want to be on the crest of the wave.
This leads me back to vocabulary. Surprisingly, the conversation I had with Sina was not the first time I had talked about vocabulary recently. I also had a discussion with my friend Michel. We were talking about opening up the process in order to gain investment in the show (we talked about a lot of fascinating things, this was only one of them). Somehow we got around to discussing how people defined what a show was. She said that, as a company, we need to make our definition of a show, and then apply that definition to what we do. We could call every time we open our doors to the public a show. By doing this we change the audience and company dynamic. One way that dynamic changes is the expectations an audience has when coming to see a show. If our shows are informal discussions, or presentations of rehearsal work, then the expectation on the audience's end shifts. It may not shift immediately, but as our audience gets to know us they can understand what we mean when we use certain vocabulary. Now, does anyone want to count the number of times I used the word _show in this paragraph?
Both of these were awesome conversations. Both had similar point, but came about them in different ways. I think I do want to change the vocabulary at large, but I'm not going to try and do that. Instead, I'll change my own vocabulary then I'll change how the company defines things. Finally, hopefully, our audience might pick up on these changes. I think you can only change things by doing, not defining. This is another great question I will add to my list of things to ponder.
Thanks to Sina and Michel for the inspiring discussion.
- Sam Bergmann-Good
Evaluating
The Devised Yukon Project has come to a close. We finished with pubic presentations of a new work. It is somewhat crazy to see how far we've come these past 8 weeks. Then again, I have taken part in three week and even two week creation processes; now that is crazy. I'm glad we had the amount of time that we did. I don't think we would have learned as much if the time was any shorter and in the end this project was about learning for the future.
I'm so grateful for all the help along the way. I cannot say that enough. This has been a long difficult process with some steep learning curves. I'm glad I was surronded by supportive and encouraging people. I'm especially happy to be working with Jessica. She makes everything seem possible.
Now, I'm spending time processing. I'm bringing together all the feedback and am soliciting more from people whose eyes I trust. Generally, the feedback has been positive. More specifically, it gives me great insight into what this play is missing and what needs work. I'm happy we got a chance to get eyeballs on our work. Around 100 people made it out to Nowhere Near. I hope those 100 people stick with us for the next stages in this process.
Immediately, this show goes in a drawer. Incubation is an important time in the development of new work. I need time and distance to reexamine the work with fresh eyes. After being in a black room for 8 weeks time is needed to sever the emotional attachments and attack the work like a playwright. I also have a ton of homework due for my final year at Humber and reports and grants to write. Priorities priorities.
When I'm ready to come back to the DYP I'm first going reevaluate the goals the collective and I came up with at the beginning of the summer. Do I know the world in which the play takes place? The people in that world? How they move and talk? What their stories are? These will be my jumping off points for the work we plan to do on the script over the winter in order to prep it for Phase II.
DYP Phase II will be a lot of revision. We will look at the text and see how we can mold it to effectively convey our story. We will do the same with the physical action and explore how we can document and prescribe physical action while still making it fresh, personal and immediate. that is the initial thrust of our work over the next year. We embark on this part of the process cautiously. I don't want to sacrifice the freshness of our work this summer for a perfectly crafted piece of theatre. Firstly, I don't think any theatre piece can be "perfect" they are just works in varying degrees of development. People mentioned that Nowhere Near didn't look like a 'work in progress', but more of a completed show. That made me happy. That is what works in development should be; a high quality theatre experience is always the goal. Secondly, my gut tells me that the messy (at times) nature of the piece is what made it more alive. Some of the words we said changed from night to night. I don't want to craft something that doesn't leave room for the actor, their input and ownership.
That is a brief rundown of thoughts I've had since we closed up shop last Saturday. I hope to continue writing about theatre here in some former another. I hope that you, my faithful reader, will continue to check back and find what I say valuable.
Have a great Fall.
Sam Bergmann—Good
The little monster
As those of you closely monitoring the creation blogs will have noticed, I have not written as many posts as i should have. There is a reason for this that i would like to share: of all of the aspects of this process of building a piece of theatre out of thin air, describing to the world and having immortalized via the internet ether my thoughts and fears, is by far the most daunting. The idea that whatever i write exits forever for anyone to see sends my heartrate through the roof. This is not something that i have shared with the group, before now, as i am self consious about it, but i feel compelled to do so out of respect for the tremendous amount of work and energy that the entire collective has invested, with the leadership of Sam and Jess. So, fomally now, I appologize for being remiss in my duties to record my process within the collective on the blog. It was not done out of laziness or disinterest, but rather dread. As i write this, my heartrate is well over 100 beats per minute. Anxiety is nothing new to me. I have been managing it for over ten years but it still manages to get the better of me in certain circumstances. I am aware right now of the contradiction in my explaining how i am unable to on the internet... on the internet. I can only repeat that i wanted the group and particularly Sam and Jess to know because they have done so much work and i don't wan't them finishing this first phase of their first project feeling that it was neither appreciated nor respected in the degree that it should be by one of their company. I thank open pit and all my fellow performers for an eye-opening summer. xox
- Adele
The end of finding and the ramble of finding it.
Today we had our fourth run of, what I shall call, the presentation piece of Phase One of the Devised Yukon Project. Although the project will continue for the proposed next two years, we have compiled a collage of our work that we have done thus far, loosely linking the snips together based upon themes of movement, text, or feeling, often finding the linkages after we have decided to put what pieces in what order. This phase of this project has been the most gratifying and focused of our two months of development, and also the most challenging.
As blogged on this site, I have at times longed for a root or source, so that we could have a focal point we consistently and constantly could refer back to and honour in order to measure our sense of truth to a story. I am a sucker for artistic formula. The classical five-act play structure and Stanislavski’s term “the science of acting,” are ideas that inspire me. I like looking at the creation of theatre as a science first, that has hypothesized experiments with set variables, that when once fully tested, then and only then do we blow the whole thing apart and start to find freedom.
When I use the term source or root, I am not specifically refering to a script or a novel or a song or a writing on a bathroom wall. It is the vision. "Why are we doing this?"
This project has forced me to let go of that notion all together. We have collectively embarked on creating a method of creating, a vocabulary for that process, a set of experiments based upon experimenting alone, and, the ultimate challenge in my mind, to discover the root piece that we honour instead of having that source already in place. When you have a root that you are trying to serve, it is easier to find a foundation of vocabulary to check in on the progress of the development and the imagining of how it is shared, because there is something to rely on. The source has a beginning, middle and end, and has it’s own voice and its own truth of one imagined statement, so there is already a basis of direction, whether or not there is a director. What excites me about this process of creation is the idea of re-interpreting or re-imagining the cathartic response felt, or lack thereof, when confronted with the source, and turning that response (that inspiration) into something fresh, with a new set of voices. This is different from re-telling. Having a root is like having veins that you need to fill your blood with; re-telling is like trying to dress up as a blood cell and go along for the trip.
When we worked with Ker Wells for two weeks in an intensive-workshop style the group was introduced to Ker’s process of “material gathering,” which was a monumental thrusting point into this final phase of the collective’s work this summer. Ker offered us challenges/assignments (variables) to bring in scenes or stories or movement sequences that were gathered and compiled with an inspired base. For example; we brought in stories of loss, and what that meant to us individually; we brought in stories of characters that inspired us in some way; and the most mentionable and influential assignment on the project thus far was Jessica’s assignment to interview with a long route bus driver. The assignments were based in the elements of story, something always needed to happen - change needed to occur. Learning this skill of material gathering is what has helped harness this project at this juncture, and has assisted in reining in the fleeting and wonderful imaginations of the group, helping to find a focal point of creation.
Material gathering, though, is different from serving a source. Material gathering is like show-and-tell when it is not realized or utilized for a higher energy of story-telling. Serving a source requires that after experiments are tried, and all materials are gathered, that they clinically be questioned and assessed and re-adjusted, in whatever way, to honour the voice of the source. Once we implemented this gathering of material and started to see ideas brought in side by side, the piece began to take shape and we found our source.
This, I believe, is what Sam and Jessica were hoping to find; their source, and I hope as the project continues in the following two years that these eight weeks of discovering the root were beneficial.
- Shaun
Labyrinth
An idea that I had long ago has finally found it’s testing ground. With the generous support of the group I have been able to start to see the practicalities of what in my mind looks like it will be/could be amazing.
I am going to go ahead and give it away, but essentially the idea is getting actors to play living walls as they move and form a transformative maze with scenes budding out of wall placement and not necessarily plot. Plot would help, granted. Getting actors to play walls sounds degrading in a way. I did a show once where I had to play inanimate objects like trees and the like, and at first it felt degrading but eventually I grew into liking it because I realized the whole effect was something magical. I hope that this same effect is felt, where ever this idea goes.
I was very aware when I started “shaping” this scene of the collectives’ arms and their need to be raised for an extended time. What has ultimately been beneficial is getting a chance to bud this idea and learning that indeed the effect is worth exploring more, and that in actually trying to practice this, and just seeing actors holding fabric above their heads dancing around, I have learned what the structural design of the walls needs to be to both give the actors (walls) the most efficient and effective mobility, creating a comfort for them, as well as give the fabric the shape it needs to maintain a wall-like appearance and give it the possibility of becoming something other than a wall using in a moment’s notice.
The Labyrinth as a mythical situation fascinates because it is a microcosm of what life really is; we reach points in our journey that we can only see or feel so far ahead of us and the minute options of which way to go. – “Do I go this way or that, where will that lead us?” And we make a choice (or we don’t and we just stand still) based upon that analysis. And then we go, often second guessing every step of the way, until finally someone says just trust your instincts or your gut, and the whole thing is blown wide open.
-Shaun
rounding things out
Today we did our second full run of the show. It's clocking under an hour. Its slowed down five minutes as we come into it more. Felt really good today.
The work, the words, and the actions really do come from us - I always knew that, obviously, but there is something about everything on stage under light that strikes me. I feel myself in and around the piece, and I see other people's experiences and ideas coming out on stage, melding into this story pot we've concocted.
I've never experienced this before. It's deeply personal but it isn't about me. And somehow these showings of our work to date cause me more stage fright than I've ever felt. Shows I've acted in, sung in, danced in, shows where I really didn't know my stuff as well as I do now, the level of stage fright they induced pales in comparison. Jessica mentioned, and I agree with her, that it's because of how personal it is - not that the story is personal, but the effort is personal. So much of ourselves is involved. Offering that effort up to an audience brings up a lot of anxiety.
I have a feeling that because my stories are lying there hidden under action, text, and an overarching story, they're somehow barely disguised and waiting to be discovered. But really, no one will ever see them. They're forming the fabric of something new, they're no longer decipherable as my own very personal offerings.
I feel like I should say something about process and reflect on my past posts.
Maybe a round up of some things I've learned -
- if you use your body everyday it will talk to you more than ever
- trying a million things on their feet and getting one good thing is easier than thinking a milion things through in your head - there is a certainty possible in seeing things moving that you can't always achieve on paper
- impulse is a beautiful thing to be followed - if the result of the impulse is wrong, or not the best thing for what you need, another impulse will tell you so
- sometimes you think something looks great from inside, and turns out it looks like shit from outside; that outside editing eye really can't be lost. I know this, we know this, but how easy to forget and fall in love with ourselves all the time
- words can be used so sparingly and still have so much affect (i.e., the penultimate - 'For Sale: Baby Shoes, Never Worn. We should all be so lucky.)
I suppose I knew all of these things. But now I know them more than ever, and now I understand better. If I run into these lessons again, or struggle, for example, with being too verbose, or ignoring impulses, some little part of my brain will say 'Sarah ... remember what you learned with Sam Bergmann-Good, Jessica Hickman, Shaun McComb, Adele Gigantes, and Genevieve Doyon...', and I'll curse myself because I have learned, and I can't go back to pretending I don't know certain things. I have practiced and pushed myself to a higher standard. Shucks.
I'm really proud of what I have done and what we have done together. I think you should come see it. Friday and Saturday, 8pm, and a special afternoon tea version on Saturday at 2pm. You bring the crustless cucumber sandwiches.
- Sarah